Always (Time for Love Book 4) Read online

  “I wanted to be here early,” she said with a smile.

  “Why?”

  “Just because, Ash,” she replied, peering at him through her lashes.

  Ash frowned. “Have you had breakfast?”

  “Have you?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

  Ash’s lips twitched and he let out a sigh. “Fine. Could you get us both something to eat, please?”

  “And what would you like, Doc?” she asked, hiding her smile. She wasn’t expecting this. Their I-eat-when-you-eat arrangement was for lunch only. But she wasn’t going to point that out. At least he’d be getting some sustenance before he started his busy day.

  He shrugged. “A bacon roll or something. And a coffee.”

  She stood up and grabbed her handbag. “Coming right up. And breakfast is on me,” she added when he pulled his wallet out.

  “No. All food is on me,” he said with deadly seriousness, getting some money out. “Don’t even think of arguing, Brenna Ward. I don’t like that you’re here too early. This is simply another compromise so you don’t starve.”

  “Fine,” she said grabbing the cash from his hand. She grinned when her back was turned to him. It may not be a big thing, but he just showed he still cared.

  *

  Ash’s office door was open when Brenna came back with his breakfast.

  “Here you are, honey,” she said, placing the food on a clear spot on his desk.

  Hopefully, the term of endearment would have some effect. She’d called him that a few times in the past, just like she’d often used the word on her best friends. But after she’d kissed him on the lips last night, she hoped he’d pick up that it meant something more this time.

  “Thanks, babe. I’ll eat it while I work,” Ash said, smiling at her before turning his attention back to the open folder in front of him.

  Babe? She stared at him, dumbstruck, her heart hammering. What did ‘babe’ mean? He’d never called her that before.

  After a moment, Ash looked up at her again. “Sorry, Bren. I really need to go over this patient file. Promise I’ll eat at the same time.”

  “Oh, yeah, sure,” she said, flustered.

  “Where’s your breakfast?”

  “On my desk.”

  “Good. Don’t work too hard.”

  “Only if you don’t work too hard,” she quipped, heading for the door. “I’ll bring you lunch at one-thirty.”

  “Okay, sweetheart,” he said.

  Wha-at? He had never called her sweetheart before. She gaped at him, but he was already concentrating on some document, frowning at it. She went back to the reception desk, totally stunned—in a good way. A very good way.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Ash chuckled silently as he watched Brenna walk back to her desk. He’d shocked her. That much was obvious.

  Well, tit for tat. She’d shocked him last night, too.

  That kiss on the lips had floored him. He’d stared at her closed door for interminable seconds, wondering what it had meant. But since she’d immediately gone back inside her apartment, he’d turned around and gone home.

  He’d regretted leaving it at that, though. He should have banged on her door, pulled her in an embrace and resumed the kiss. Unfortunately, when it came to Brenna and his heart, he was a coward.

  He’d lain on his bed and stared at the ceiling for hours last night, replaying in his mind Brenna’s actions these last few days.

  If it had been some other woman, he’d say she’d most definitely been flirting with him—even being seductive at times. But it was hard for him to believe that Brenna ever meant to intentionally flirt and seduce. She’d been oblivious to his feelings for years, and had never indicated she wanted anything other than a platonic relationship. Why would things be different all of a sudden?

  He couldn’t even hazard a guess... until this morning, after he woke up.

  Brenna must have noticed something the day he carried her to the water at Bondi Beach. He did discern a change in the way she’d been acting around him since then, but he’d refused to look deeper into it. She must have picked up on his wordless signals, and had finally realised he had feelings for her.

  Knowing Brenna, she would be feeling guilty if she thought she’d been hurting him, albeit unconsciously. Her MO had always been to overcompensate for her perceived misdeeds by doing helpful things, just like the time she’d worked for hours organising his mother’s kitchen after she broke some plates.

  He now suspected that the main reason why Brenna had taken annual leave to help at his clinic was exactly that—to make up for breaking his heart.

  But he didn’t want her guilt, pity or sympathy. He wanted her love.

  And it was the kiss on the lips that thoroughly confused him. He could see no reason for it—unless Brenna had become open to the idea of them being a couple, and was giving him hints.

  Of course he’d love for that to be the motivation for the kiss. But he couldn’t allow himself to get too excited. It was all conjecture on his part.

  So he’d come to a decision before he left home that morning. Since Brenna probably already suspected he had feelings for her, he’d show her that he did like her a lot. But he had to be careful not to overwhelm her. If she didn’t feel the same, it would be easy to play down a mere like. They should still be able to keep a friendship then. But if Brenna found out he was in love with her and couldn’t return those deeper feelings, it might be impossible to remain friends. He’d rather walk around with a wounded heart than lose her altogether.

  Even if she could never love him back the way he loved her, he would never choose not having Brenna in his life. It would be like cutting out a part of his heart. Sure, that part might be all wounded and scarred, but how could he live without a full heart?

  So for now, keeping it fun and light was the order of the day.

  *****

  Ash was escorting a patient out of the testing room when he saw Brenna walk in with a carry-bag. He smiled. The ever-efficient Miss Organiser had lunch ready in time—like she’d said she would.

  He walked to reception and gave instructions to the temp regarding his patient, then gave Brenna a small nod. She followed him to his office.

  “Ready for your break, Doc?” she asked.

  “Sure am. Why don’t you have lunch with me in my office?”

  “Really? You won’t be working?”

  “I noticed I have an hour until the next patient comes in. I’m sure I can spare about forty-five minutes for a little break.”

  Brenna halted him, her face alight. “In that case, why don’t we go across the road and enjoy the sunshine while we’re having lunch?”

  He smiled. It had always been at the back of his mind to walk around the Royal Botanic Gardens whenever he found some time. In the three years he’d worked opposite the public gardens, he’d only visited it four or five times. He’d simply been too busy.

  “Sounds good,” he said.

  “Great. Let me tell Dora.”

  *

  “Dora almost fell off her chair when I told her we were heading out here for a lunch break,” Brenna said as they sat on a bench amongst the rose bushes.

  “She’s not used to me taking a proper break,” he said, then laughed when Brenna gave him a censuring look while she took contents from out of the bag.

  “I got us some sushi.” She handed him a big plastic container filled with one of his favourite foods.

  “Yum. Thanks.”

  “Look what else I got,” Brenna said, holding up a magazine with familiar faces on the cover.

  “Hm. They’re moving on to Sarah and Jeff’s wedding, huh?”

  “Yes. I think they’ve used up all their photos from Zach and Bec’s wedding, so they’re now talking about the next big celebration. But of course, a little intrigue is to be expected. They’re wondering if all is well with Sarah and Jeff, since there hasn’t been any news on their actual wedding date.”

  Ash snorted, shaking his head. />
  “And look who else is on here,” Brenna said, pointing to a smaller photo on the cover.

  “Greg and Gemma,” he said with a laugh. “What are they saying about them?”

  “Well, they still reckon these two are an item. I’ll have to talk to Gemma later and see what she thinks of all this. But unfortunately, Ash, there’s still nothing about you in here. Sorry,” Brenna added teasingly.

  “Ah, my time will come,” he joked.

  “Yeah. And wouldn’t it be great if it would be about you and me?”

  He glanced at Brenna, who was staring at him with wide eyes, her lips parted. She placed her palm on his cheek, making it hard for him to breathe. In the next second, he found himself leaning towards her, pulled by some power he had no hope of resisting.

  He fitted his mouth with hers and revelled in the soft feel of her lips. They kissed, slowly at first, then more passionately, tongues eagerly stroking each other.

  Joy blossomed inside of him. Just how long had he waited for this moment? How often had he dreamed of this? He was kissing Brenna—and she was kissing him back.

  He could have stayed like that for hours. He wanted to, but he was getting hard—too hard—and they were in a very public place. Reluctantly, he pulled away.

  He was already breathing hard from their kiss, but seeing Brenna’s flushed, smiling face—looking up at him with desire—took his breath away. God, she was beautiful. In hindsight, perhaps they should have stayed in his office, with the door locked.

  “You should eat,” Brenna breathed, running her thumb on his bottom lip.

  He chuckled. “After that kiss, that’s what you say?”

  She giggled. “You’ve rendered me almost speechless, Dr. Payne.”

  He grinned and gave her a short peck before opening the container holding his lunch. He would have loved to sit here with her for the rest of the afternoon, but work awaited them.

  They ate their lunch and talked about the usual things, laughing and enjoying an easy conversation. Only this time, they sat closer together, with Brenna occasionally dipping her head on his shoulder, and him kissing her hair. It was pure bliss, and he knew he was in deep trouble. But this time, he didn’t care.

  *****

  Ash plonked himself on his bed and stared at the ceiling. He didn’t get to have dinner with Brenna tonight because of an after-work function he had to attend. Damn, he was missing her. After their magical lunch at the gardens today, all he wanted was to be by her side all day. Just how bad had he got it?

  It was almost eleven, and he wondered what she was doing now. She’d said she was going to have a quiet dinner at home and relax. She did offer for him to come around for coffee if he wanted to, no matter what the time. So what was stopping him from heading over to her place?

  He sighed. He knew that if he went there tonight, he wouldn’t want to go home until tomorrow. Wouldn’t that be going too fast?

  “Hell, I’ve already waited long enough,” he muttered, getting up and getting dressed.

  *

  Ash pressed the call button for Brenna’s apartment.

  “Ash?” she asked through the intercom.

  His heart skipped merely from the sound of her voice. “Yep,” he said, smiling in anticipation.

  The building front door clicked and he walked in—well, more like rushed in, really. Everything about him was excited. And right now, his cock was competing with his heart as to which one was more eager to see Brenna.

  Her door opened as he approached it.

  “Hi,” she said, eyes shining.

  He meant to respond, but the words didn’t come out when his breath was knocked out of him. Brenna was wearing a short satin robe which stopped mid-thigh, showing off her sexy legs. But his gaze was pulled to her chest, where he could clearly make out her erect nipples through the material.

  “Um, are you coming in?” Brenna asked nervously, her face flushing.

  He smiled. Had he embarrassed her with his drooling stare?

  He stepped inside and wrapped her in his arms. “Bren,” he whispered, before claiming her mouth.

  Brenna gave a little moan and slid her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his.

  “Were you waiting for me?” he breathed against her lips.

  “Yes. I’m glad you came,” she said shyly.

  He groaned softly, running his hands up and down her back while he covered her face with kisses.

  Brenna leaned back and looked into his eyes. Then she took his hand and led him to the bedroom.

  He followed eagerly. Heck, he’d follow her anywhere if she kept on looking at him like that.

  They stopped at the foot of her bed, facing each other.

  He touched Brenna’s face, running the tips of his fingers on her cheeks and lips. Was he really here? With her? In her bedroom?

  He’d been prepared to think that being with Brenna was a lost cause. Yet here she was in front of him, gazing back with passion in her eyes.

  “Is this really you, Bren?” he asked softly.

  She smiled. “No one else, Ash.”

  Slowly, he ran his hands down her front, grazing her hardened peaks. His cock jerked as Brenna gasped. He pulled the sash of her robe, untying it and pushing the slinky material off her shoulders. He hissed under his breath, his knees weakening at the sight of Brenna’s naked body.

  “Beautiful,” he whispered, his eyes greedily roaming.

  “Are you just gonna stare?” Brenna teased, her tone breathless.

  “No. Most definitely not,” he said, curving an arm around her waist and pulling her to him. He resumed kissing her face, then proceeded to her neck, all the while stroking her smooth body with his burning hands.

  “Ash,” Brenna cried softly, gathering the hem of his shirt and helping him to take it off. Then her hands went to his jeans.

  He let her unbuckle his belt, but halted her when she tried undo his button.

  “No, sweetheart. Not yet,” he said, gently moving her hands away. It would be so easy for him to lose control once his cock was free from its confines. There were so many things he wanted to do to her first.

  “I want to,” Brenna complained, kissing his jaw and going for his jeans button again.

  “There’s plenty of time, honey. Soon,” he said, grabbing her hands and placing them up his chest instead.

  “Don’t you want me to show you what I’ve been dreaming about doing to you for weeks?” she whispered seductively, placing light kisses on his neck.

  “You’ve been dreaming about me for weeks?” he asked. Breathing had suddenly become almost impossible.

  “Uh-huh. And I’ve been really, really wanting to do this.”

  This time, he didn’t stop Brenna from unzipping him. He groaned when she reached inside his pants.

  “You’re wearing undies,” she said, sounding a little disappointed.

  “Yeah. I always do. Boxer shorts.”

  “Not always,” she said with an impish grin as she grasped his already hard-as-steel member.

  “What do you mean?” he asked in a strangled voice, trying not to moan. Ahh, her hand felt fucking good.

  “There was one time you went commando,” she said, looking down with lustful eyes at the hardness she was stroking. Then she pushed his pants down so he could step out of them.

  “I’ve never gone commando,” he responded in confusion, stifling a moan as Brenna reached for his erection again.

  “Yes, you have. That day when you got your pants wet at Bondi.”

  Now he remembered. He hadn’t wanted to borrow Connor’s underwear. “Did Connor tell you?”

  “No,” she said, kissing his chest.

  “Amanda?” His sister must have noticed when he returned Connor’s clothes.

  “No.” Brenna let go of his hard-on to put her arms around his neck and press herself against him.

  He gasped, loving the feel of his cock trapped between their bodies. “Then how did you know I went commando?” he ask
ed, fast losing his concentration at the conversation they were having.

  Brenna squeezed his butt cheeks and rubbed her body against his, making him groan in pleasure. Argh, she was driving him crazy. And he couldn’t help but crush her to him and devour her mouth. He lifted her and dropped her on the bed, covering her with his body.

  “I saw you,” she said, pulling his head down to kiss him on the lips.

  “Mmm. What?”

  “I saw you go commando.”

  He stared down at her. “You saw me?”

  “Uh-huh. I was in the bathroom and the door was slightly ajar.”

  “That day at Amanda and Connor’s, you saw me naked?”

  Brenna nodded her head, biting her bottom lip. “I thought you were really hot.”

  “You did?” he asked, a grin spreading on his face.

  She nodded again. “After you put on Connor’s pants—without undies—I was imagining unzipping you and stroking you and licking you so you’d go hard. Because you weren’t hard then... but you were still stunning.”

  “Ah, Bren,” he groaned, her words arousing him even more. “You know what I’ve been dreaming about for a long, long time?” he whispered, giving her earlobe a gentle bite.

  “What?”

  “I’ll show you.” He gave her a thorough kiss on the lips before moving southwards.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Brenna tried to stifle a moan as Ash’s hot lips moved to her throat. She was already panting out loud, and he’d hardly done anything to her yet. Embarrassment at her lusty reaction threatened to surface, but she shooed it away. This was Ash, and she wanted to fully immerse herself in their first time.

  Ash cupped a breast, gently kneading it, before he dipped his head to take the nipple in his mouth.

  “Ash!” she cried softly, pleasure bolts zinging through her.

  “I’ve been wanting to do this for so long,” he murmured, flicking his tongue on her bud before laving its twin with the same enthusiasm. When he pinched her nipple lightly, while licking the other one, she arched her back to him, eager for more.

  “Do you know what else I’ve dreamed about?” Ash murmured, his eyes blazing with desire as he glanced up her face.